Interview with Freddie Mercury in 1987 on the occasion of his birthday, celebrated in Ibiza
David Wigg, 1987
DW: What do you want to say?
FM: I'm very happy with my relationships at the moment. And I couldn't... I really, honestly, couldn't ask for better. I've finally found… a nish, that I was looking for all my life. It's like... I'm not... I don't have to try so hard, I don't have to prove myself hard. I've got a very understanding relationship. This is like... Oh, God, it’s sounds like... I've wanted a kind of genuine tranquil after the storm... and I think... most of all... everybody expects me to have stormy relationships.
FM: You know, and I was visually living my own media... In fact, you can get caught up in it. I actually thought that was a way I should be. As I was trying to force people to have a relationship with me in that way... No really, it's so easy... I thought - I have to change for that. It's quite easy. Or - a kind of relationship without sort of hoping about what we talking about whatever. It's quite easy. But finding that wonderful person is very hard.
DW: See, you kind of living your own heat lowing spin … up stormy relationship.
FM: Yeah, I was trying too hard. I was also searching too hard. You know, I really believed… I… It was not such thing as… like…” I’m not normal”- I have a normal sort of life. I can’t sort of good… a tape o’clock, and I can’t sort of have I staid… Cause I mean… I've always thought, that: “no, you have to be the spoke, no, you have to be a captain of the ship, every time there is any kind of gathering, or whatever. I was trying so hard - like performing for everybody.
DW: Yes, yes!
FM: Even off stage. And I just thought: no, you don't have to do it. Let others do it. Just be, be yourself and be, you know… be rather a man. So I love this. Yes, I am boring. I’m sorry, I can’t entertain you.
DW: Do you enjoy fame, Freddie? Would you miss it?
FM: I know nothing else. No, really. To me it's normal. I work for it - and I pay for it. So, I mean, you know, to have my wonderful Japanese gardens with all this sort of comicard, bought at such expense… I love it. Because, I mean anybody else - well if they like coy, and they have money - they would buy it. So, why not me? Yes, I do it. To me it's... I enjoy reaping the prophets. You know?
FM: No, really. Yes. It's like winning the pools – and exactly like winning a pool every day. I can quiet... And if there is anybody else - I would say "good luck" to him. You know I just wish everyone to say to say the same to me. You know. Good luck to him. I’ve worked out for money. No bizz giving it to me, dear. I've earned it. It's mine to do what I want with. And so if I want a pyramid in Kensington, and if I’ll bought it – I’ll have it.
DW. (laughs very much)
FM: We are getting there. Cause I tell you I am not giving my, any of my stuff away when I dead. I tell you - I gonna hold it. It want to be burieDW.th all my stuff.
FM: Íes, why not? Every damp soon.
DW: A lot of people think for some reason that you are, that you live in... like a... recluse. That you are reclusive man. I mean you've already said you have relationship now.
FM: I am a bit but not in a way… I've said it... not in a Greta Garbo way. This is not… not a sort of conciliated thing… I like to be… It's a funny thing. It's not alone-alone. I like to be alone with my friends and then chuck myself off. Yes. I hate to be on a desert island. I would loathe that... without anybody. But I mean I hate... you know they have to coax me to go on in sort of volunteer myself. Into a sort… in every day sort of… I've really have stopped all that. I do like people around me, yes. May be it's sort of shy, a sort of a cloak. Cause I don't picture mine being alone. But it's true. I have to be totally comfortable in the situation before I decide to step into it. That's the sort of side of me. I can take a numerous risks in the music world. Do you see what I mean?
FM: That's an area, which… the world I live in, where there are no boundaries for me. I would take risks in music. And I won't take risks in terms of social life or and any other kind of thing.
DW: Freddie, how has the AIDS thing affected you?
FM: Well… I've stopped going out whatever. And… to be honest, I tell you, I've almost become a nun.
FM: Really, yeah. I thought... It's amazing... I learn very hard but… I thought sex was very important thing to me and I lived to sex. And now I just realize how amazing… I've just cut completely that way. You see, I'm one of those people that can go from black to white. I don't like intermediary measures. It's quite easy for me to completely give up things. I can give up alcohol at the drop of a hat. Yes. And – yes, if it frightened me that – I’ve… I’ve... I’ve just stopped having sex.
DW: Have you?
DW: You've given up sex?
FM: Yeah. I just like titillation now. (DW.& Freddie laughs) - A minute of titillation.
FM: Yeah. For fun.
DW: Is it?
FM: Yeah. Titillation.
DW: You must have had lots of affairs I mean through your life.
FM: Yes, well, I mean… you has been (?closed) and nothing…. Yes. But I've stopped all that. It's a ball.
DW: It's a ball. Do you think, sex is an….
FM: No,no,no! Don’t take sex as a ball. It's just what I was doing before. You know how you have faces. You know, It's like people go through faces. And of course... And this ... I have a very good relationship and just before of course I was very quick in everything. And of course people are creed, people always wanted something more than... To me, sex is very... sex was fun. And you know, there was a lot of... you know, I was extremely promiscuous. That's true. But I've stopped all that because I mean practice oozed [in the tour] And I’m also an old […].And I just thought: you knew that the in world solos came into it. So I mean it can’t be…you can't say I have a life for solos and go off fucking around the world.
FM: And so... It's amazing... I don't miss it, I really don't. To me it’s sort of… It was like a high. Everything I did… I mean... there was a sort of... everything was open to me. Some terms of music, it was... to me sex was a very integral ingredient to what I was doing. So it was a very making factor a lot of things I did. But I mean I would never also thought "oh! Sex and nothing else!", you know. It was all these things, and I was just living by them all. I was living them to the full. So I mean, OK, it was excess in every direction. Fine, you know. Yes. And that means not all this sort of so-called heavy-weights like, you know, drugs. It was also music, you see? So I was weighing them all together. So I had… I was living what we call a very full life in every direction. Yes, why not?
DW: Do you every worry that you could end up lonely, rich old man when you're seventy.
FM: No, because - I've answered before – Because I would be dead long before that.
FM: I tell you. There’s no other way.
DW: Do you think that? Why do you think that?
FM: Because it's boring to be 70.
DW: Would it be?
FM: But I tell you that. I can answer that when I'm 70 yours isn't around there. (laughs very much)
DW. (laughs very much): Why should I be?
FM: I won't be there (laughs very much). Oh, darling, I'll be dead gone. Starting a new life somewhere else, dear.
DW: You mean, you don't expect your health …
FM: Actually, I really don't care.
DW: You don’t care?
FM: I don’t really care. I don't have any… aspirations to live to 70. Really. I don't want sound in sort of morbid, but I mean… I'm 41 and 70 is a long way away. And I don't give it a damn. And as far as I am concerned, I mean… I really… This is laughing. I've lived a full life and if I am dead tomorrow - I would be dead. You know. I've really have done it all. I love the fact that I make people happy. That is... in any form, you know. But I make them happy, or even if it's a half an hour of their lives in any way that I can make them feel lucky, or make them feel… or bring a smile on a surface that to me is worthwhile.